Friday, April 30, 2010

Talking about sex

What is your opinion about talking about sex with friends outside of your marriage?

I find that being able to compare my experience with that of a trusted close friend helps me feel validated in ways a man simply can't. It also focuses my attention on sex with my husband, and therefore I'm much more interested in actually engaging in sexual activities. I've gotten new ideas to spice up our sex life, and have learned to look at certain issues in new ways, which has helped me relax and enjoy sex more than ever before.

My husband feels incredibly threatened by the idea that would I share info about our sex life with anyone else. He believes that our experiences together should be kept just between us.

I've tried it his way -- and having a gag order placed on me completely kills my sex drive. He is miserable if he knows I am talking to my bff about private things. This puts a serious strain on our relationship. How do we resolve this impasse? For now, we're doing things his way, but I am having a hard time being censored and our relationship is just getting worse.

What do you think? What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom? Where do you put your boundaries about what is and isn't ok to talk about outside of your marriage?

Thursday, April 29, 2010

He Said She Said: Joint Checking Accounts

Every other Thursday, two of our contributors are asked to take opposing stances on an issue and present a case for their viewpoint. Comment and tell us who you agree with or what you believe or think! The topics are suppose to illicit a response and start a conversation in comments. Enjoy!

Topic: Joint Accounts. Yes or No?

She Said

This subject has always been a fascinating one to me so I was excited to voice my opinion.<---I know I AM ALWAYS excited to voice my opinion so shut it..

Me and Duke are "old fashioned". Very conservative. Fairly no nonsense (I'm the boss and he is not)...

When I got married there was no discussion whether or not to have joint accounts. I guess part of this is the way I was raised. You get married, you pool your money (including debt), I take his last name, he takes my parents as his own for better or worse.... snort.

Then I started talking to friends and realized this isn't a universal practice. Some wives get an "allowance", some spouses have separate checking accounts and the bills are divvied out between the two and one person is responsible for the house payment and the other takes care of other expenses.

This was totally foreign to me. Why would you take the time to do this?

DO you not trust your spouse?

If you don't, why would you marry them?

If it isn't a trust issue then what is it?

Maybe each spouse wants the freedom to spend money the way they want to without having to "hear about it" later? Let's explore that a bit...

If we have good communication & organization skills, if we share the same goals financially and are both responsible enough to stick to a budget... then there is no need for this. We should never worry about having to "hear about" ANYTHING in our marriage, right? It should be a mutual respect without fear of retribution.

So what if one spouse proves not to be fiscally responsible, but you love them and this is the only way to keep the peace? I see that... I HAVE seen that in friends. I don't know how I would handle that... maybe I would opt for separate budgets and accounts.

It makes me sad.

To me, Marriage is JOINT. It is TOGETHER. It is a meeting of the minds. If you are unable to do that then I think it may be time to evaluate the deeper problems that inhibit you from accomplishing this.

*waiting for the backlash*

He Said:

So let's talk about Joint Checking accounts.

For the sake of FULL disclosure, I am a banker, and I write this from a perspective of someone who is married and also from the perspective of a banker, who has seen the ugly side of having a joint account.

Why have a joint checking account? The answer is easy. You either want to be micromanaged by your spouse, or you want to micromanage your spouse.

Joint accounts may have few upsides, but the downsides are rather large.

Many marriages are centered around money. Money = happiness in too many marriages in America, and who cares if it is right or not, it is just the way it is. Everyone wants to say communication is the key to a happy marriage, but I am not sitting around the dining room table having dinner talking about the balance of my checking account.

I understand that my money isn't JUST my money, but rather OUR money. I work and make money to provide for my family, but I have no desire to keep my wife on such a short leash or give the illusion that I want to know what she is doing. You need to give your partner latitude to do what they think is right, because if my wife had to tell me about the purchases she made as she made them, or visa-versa, after a while, you start to think your spouse is passing judgement, not to mention that having a joint account completely messes up getting gifts for holidays. If my wife had access to my account balance details, she would know that for mother's day I ordered flowers, ordered a pandora charm, and that I have money stocked away to take her out for our anniversary. What happened to spontaneity?

I have also seen how joint accounts can break a marriage. If you have two people on one account, and you fail to tell your spouse of your purchases at Target for 37.87 and you used your debit card, you run the risk of over drafting your account and paying a ton of fees. Why pay a fee when you can just manage your own stipend?

Joint accounts are not an ideal situation, it just opens too many risks to pay fees, lose money, and spoil the surprises.

Okay now it's up to you!!! Comment away. What side do you take? Joint Accounts yes? or no?

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

What Would You Rather Wednesday?

What Would You Rather...

Would you rather schedule sex 3-5 times a week (routine sex) consistently, OR have periods of lots of sex multiple times a day (amazing sex) and then periods of long droughts?

Would you rather have your spouse cheat on you but still be IN LOVE with you OR have a spouse that is loyal to you but isn't IN LOVE with you either.

Okay... so tell us, what would you do if you had to choose ONE or the OTHER?

Please send in submissions for Group Therapy anything GOES--to and we will post them!!!

Monday, April 26, 2010

When a stranger calls (and asks for a pic)

I have been around the blogo-verse for over a year now. I have learned a whole lot in a very short amount of time. I have met some wonderful people that I am now friends with in real life. I have crossed paths with some down right creepy people too. I have seen things across blog land that have made me laugh, cry, *snigger, shake my head, wonder, learn, reconsider my opinion, and some that have just made me scrub my eyeballs and bleach my brain.

For the first half year I didn't show my face on my blog. My eyes, the back of me that is all you got. As I start feeling a bit more comfortable with myself and the blog world I started showing a bit more of myself. I now have posted pics of me and my kids full on.However, before I put myself out there on my blog - revealing what I really did look like, people would ask.

I get it, I am visual too. It kills me when I don't know what people look like on the blogs I read. However, there has been an instant or two where someone has skipped the comment box, and gone straight to email. You know these people. The ones you don't interact with every day - but there they are sending you a personal message.

It sounds like it has been written by a 7th grader, and goes something along the line of - you are so pretty I would like to see more of you. like you ass. send pics now. I'll send pics back.

Well, dang - let me get right on that. I will strip it down and take a pic of my back side and send it to you... stranger... I hope to receive the same back - gahhhh ... really? NO.

Who are these people, what are they doing with these pics *shudder*, and why would I trust you? Good gosh it takes a simple three or four clicks for any image to go viral on the web. I am pretty sure by *assets aren't what I hope to see as the next viral internet pic.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Stats, funny

We were in slow-moving traffic the other day and the car in front of us had an Obama bumper sticker on it. It read: "Pray for Obama. Psalm 109:8".

My husband's Bible was lying on the dashboard & he got it & opened it up to the scripture & read it. He started laughing & laughing. Then he read it to me. I couldn't believe what it said. I had a good laugh, too.

Psalm 109:8
"May his days be few; and let another take his place of leadership. "

At last - I can voice a Biblical prayer for our president! Look it up - it is word for word! Let us all bow our heads and pray.

How true is that!?

Where y'all clickers live!

44 8.80% Utah United States
35 7.00% California United States
26 5.20% Newcastle Upon Tyne United Kingdom
24 4.80% New York United States
21 4.20% Nevada United States
20 4.00% Virginia United States
19 3.80% Indiana United States
19 3.80% Oklahoma United States
18 3.60% Ontario Canada Canada
14 2.80% Hawaii United States
11 2.20% Texas United States
11 2.20% Michigan United States
10 2.00% Haryana India India
10 2.00% Colorado United States

Search Terms!

5 8.20% tease my man
3 4.92% tease my husband
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3 4.92% gq and maxim on romance and relationships
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2 3.28% ashamed of snooping email
2 3.28% intimacy dysfunction
2 3.28% being less emotionally dependent
1 1.64% venus vs mars sex
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1 1.64% wife gets jealous when husband visits his parents
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1 1.64% husband jealous of male friend
1 1.64%
1 1.64% marrying a friend for companionship
1 1.64% what he said what she heard venus mars
1 1.64% sex everyday 2010
1 1.64% in the real world Venus
1 1.64% tease texting to loved ones
1 1.64% stay at home mom feeling unappreciated
1 1.64% women jealous of spouses female friends
1 1.64% Why would a spouse keep bring up a secret that he has kept but won't tell about it.
1 1.64% my ex husband wants to babysit our kids in my house
1 1.64% venus and mars "april 18"
1 1.64% the real mars day
1 1.64% why is mars more suitable than venus to live on
1 1.64% wife addicted in treatment husband jelous
1 1.64% mars "absence makes the heart grow fonder"
1 1.64% tease texts examples
1 1.64% everday for 30 days
1 1.64% mars Venus long distance
1 1.64% real world venus vs mars
1 1.64% venus vs. mar
1 1.64% why my wife is jelous to me
1 1.64% what if our venuses and mars don't match up?
1 1.64% I feel like my wife is jelous of my career
1 1.64% in laws dont play with grandkid
1 1.64% growing old with spouse

Where you click!


Go see what the Hotdads has going on!

Southern Sage <<<< NSFW on Sunday

Friday, April 23, 2010

The things he teaches...Female Perspective

My partner teaches things to my children I don't want them learning because they think it's funny-or my spouse overreacts to things I teach my kids it's all in good fun.

That was the topic... don't ask me how I came up with that topic. In fact, I've sat for a whole day thinking of how I was going to effectively get my point across! Dang it Jim!

Then my husband sent me this two days ago:

And now I have proof of what I'm talking about.

My husband goes to school on Tuesday's and Thursday's and sometimes Friday's. Other than that he has an internship sometimes in the mornings but he's basically Mr. Mom right now (which means he has the biggest influence on them on a day to day basis) and I'm the one out of the house working, working, and working.

The picture above was his "arts and crafts" for the morning with our little girl. She is 4 turning 5 in a few months.

They cut out pictures from a magazine and pasted them on a piece of card stock. Innocent enough right?

Wrong... let's get a close up:

I think that has at least one naked top girl (the other two have on nude body covers)-the word SEX is on there, (my 4 almost 5 year old can sound out words, so basically she can read, especially three letter, phonetically correct words).

This isn't the only example of stuff my husband does around my kids. When they are young he likes to teach them to say "truck" but it really sounds like the F-word that rhymes with truck. He'll get them to say on cue, "Truck You" -- ummm yea.

Or what about when we stop at a stop light and he rolls down the window and my boy says, "Hey HEY!" or "Hey Girl what's your number?!" cat calling basically.

He has my little girl say it to boys or guys.

He thinks it's hilarious.

He also watches "fake" wrestling and he'll lean over and say stuff to my sweet boy like, "she's hot huh?"and then my boy will smile and shake his head up and down or back and forth depending on what he thinks, well he did that when he was little, now my boy says "aaaah yea" or "heck no".

What I'm saying is I think my husband forgets that these are his kids and not his "poker buddies" (he doesn't play poker, but you know what I mean) sometimes. Sure it's cute when they're little (and I'll admit to laughing more than once when I hear the product of his teaching)...but some of this stuff is not so cute when they get older.

You get what I mean?

What do you think? How would you respond? Does your spouse teach your children things you wish they wouldn't?


Thursday, April 22, 2010


Today's topic: What irritating things does your spouse teach your kids that you find annoying, OR, what irritating things do you teach your kids that your spouse finds annoying.

That's a lot of irritating and annoying!

I thought about pointing the finger. About the way the kitchen counters never manage to stay clean, especially after meals or snack time. How nothing ever gets put away where it belongs. Or how the salt shaker is never where it should be but is rather always found in the living room or on my wife's desk. (I'm a 5S sort of guy, and find clutter . . . irritating and annoying.)

Yeah, I thought about going there, but then I remembered that I'm not supposed to use the internets to talk smack about my wife. So I won't go there.


Instead, I'll tell you about Joe.

Back in the day, Joe was a client of mine at a day program for individuals with developmental disabilities. His specific diagnosis is not important. For the purpose of this post, I'll just tell you that Joe had a thing for chickens. There was never a topic of discussion so interesting that it couldn't be livened up with a little bit of chicken. We'd be sitting at a table, sorting hangers from a local department store by size or working on some other program-specific task, chatting about the weather or music, and while everyone else chimed in with their individual thoughts or opinions, Joe would inevitably, regardless of the topic or circumstance, shout out . . .


And we'd usually laugh it up, obviously reinforcing his behavior. Bad idea, I know. But you had to be there. Sometimes he'd start low, saying it softly, with a mischievous grin . . .


We'd ignore it as best as possible and try to steer him back to the task at hand. But then he'd just get louder. And add a dash of inflection . . .


It was the word and the sound at the same time. An onomatopoeia of sorts. And because it was so damn catchy, someone would repeat it. And then he'd get really loud . . .


And that usually did it. We'd do our own unique version of The Chicken Dance, he'd laugh hard, we'd laugh harder, and the day was ruined. It didn't take long for "chicken" to become the automated response offered by the staff to any mundane inquiry:

Boss: "So, what are your plans for the weekend?"
Me: "chicken"

Boss: "Why were you late this morning?"
Me: "chick-KUN?!"

Boss: "Say, could yo-"

You get the point. And it spread beyond the front door of the facility. Everywhere were opportunities to use the word CHICKEN!

Then I had kids. And the fun really started! Remember all those songs you learned as a wee one? None were sacred . . .

"Twinkle, twinkle, little - CHICKEN!" "Row, row, row your - CHICKEN!" "All I want for Christmas is my two front - CHICKEN!"

And classic books for children?

"One fish, two fish, red fish, blue - CHICKEN!" Charlotte was, of course, a web-spinning - CHICKEN! George was a very curious - CHICKEN! And that very hungry caterpillar always managed to eat - CHICKEN!

The real fun is coming up with words that rhyme with - CHICKEN! (I'll let you offer yours in the comments . . . )

Needless to say, the game was really afoot when the kids got older and could impose CHICKEN! upon any conversation on their own.

Why is this so annoying? Honestly, I don't know. It makes many of the things my wife enjoys exponentially more entertaining. Take Josh Groban, for instance:

"You raise me up, so I can stand on - CHICKEN!"

Or Daughtry:

"I'm staring out into the night, trying to hide the - CHICKEN!"

Or Taylor Swift:

"You're on the phone with your - CHICKEN!"

See? Not irritating at all . . .


Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Group Therapy: Commitment

Welcome to Group Therapy:

I didn't have a write in (please feel free to send in your questions or concerns on marriage or relationships for our Wednesday Group Therapy Sessions) so I thought I'd use this time to bring up something I have been thinking about lately.

What does it take to have a Long Lasting Relationship?

What is the secret?

I read articles that friendship was the key...but I think that is to simple. That is why you begin a relationship, but not fully why it lasts.

Love? Definitely...but that doesn't always get you through the rough times, some people love each other and STILL get divorced.

So as I browsed and read and wasted several hours minutes one word kept popping up that for me seems to be the key to our marriage. Sure we have only been married for 10 years, but by some standards that's a really LONG time!

That word is commitment.

I don't think enough couples take that seriously or respectfully. I think commitment weathers you through the storms or those times that you question WHY you love your partner or HOW you are friends with them. Commitment is telling that other person, "hey, I'm in it for the long haul, so even if I want to really walk out and leave you and this situation, I'm not going to because I said 'til death do us part' or 'forever' or 'I'll change your diapers when you no longer can'", whatever it is you said. You made a promise and I think believing and knowing there is no other option than the two of you for as long as you made that commitment, I think it changes the way you go about handling certain situations.

Knowing that if you walk out on something unresolved that it will just be waiting for you when you get back to resolve it, may help you to just turn around and face it, get the situation resolved, and move on with life.

Commitment: the secret to a long lasting relationship?

You tell me? If you had to choose ONE thing that was the key to a relationship lasting what word pops in your mind?


Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I Found Out Long Ago It's a Long Way Down the Holiday Road

I am a planner by nature. Throughout my life, I have put together activities for my friends from simple outings to trips to scavenger hunts. I met WonderWife™ during a kickball game that I co-organized for some friends. I even had a hand in planning my own bachelor party. I am an organized person and I like to research, so planning vacations don’t phase me. Plus, I kinda don’t trust others to get the details right.

WonderWife™ is also a good planner. She may be a bit less organized than me but she gets the job done, especially when it comes to booking plane tickets where she can sniff out a bargain like a beagle on the hunt.

Like most things in my marriage, we work well together planning a vacation. Of course, we don’t take very many vacations. More often than not, if we’re packing up the brood in a car or a plane, we’re trekking to visit family. But when we do plan a bona-fide Geek Boy family vacation, WW™ and I do it together. When it comes to taking the vacation, however, we deviate in our methodology.

I’ve gotta be honest with you, when I’m a on vacation I get a little Clark Griswold. I not only read the guidebooks, I ingest them. In the weeks before, I’m all over the internet. (Ah glorious internet, how could I have possibly existed before you? I want to know all of my options for fun and figure out a way to fit them into the trip. I plan. I schedule. I need to make sure I know what we’re doing at least a day or two in advance. I’m the guy who lugs around the books and makes lists. I don’t want to miss something cool. If the world’s largest ball of twine is in the area, we should be there to bask in its splendor, right?

WonderWife™ plays it much looser on vacation. Her attitude is this: the rest of our lives are scheduled, why do it on vacation? So what if we don’t go hiking today? There’s tomorrow.

This kind of drives me nuts.

But she’s right. A vacation isn’t a vacation if every minute is planned out. So I’ve had to learn to mellow out and compromise. There are a few big ticket things that we plan, but we also need to give ourselves enough freedom to play things fast and loose.

And you know what? Some of the best times we’ve had have been spontaneous excursions that have sprung up because we’ve had the time for them (and because we’ve had the guidebook with us).

How about you? Who is the planner when you take vacations? Do you have different vacation philosophies?

Monday, April 19, 2010

Vacation Planning

Since I am the planner in the family, I tend to run with the vacation planning. In fact, when hubby suggested we take a road trip to Arizona, four states away, I’m not sure he really meant it. However, once I got actually buy-in, the planning began. The number of miles and hours on the road would be many. But the places we could see would make for a great family vacation.

The road trip binder contained a day-by-day break down with directions and maps for the day, the activities planned and what we would need for each. Each of my girls also had a similar binder with journal pages and activity pages for each day. While my family tends to pick on me for being overly organized, the binders were a huge hit.

Three days of driving to reach our destination – my brother’s house. Four days of fun in the sun and three more days of driving to get home. Overall, we had a great trip. Visited family, saw great scenery, and did fun activities. Hubby, who has a bad back, was a great sport. However, I’m pretty sure he’ll be planning the next road trip – and that it won’t be such a long trip.

Next planning session - summer camping. Well, I’m off to start filling the camping binder with calendars, maps, and checklists.

How about you? Who does your vacation planning?

Domestically Disabled

Sunday, April 18, 2010


Browsers, I have never heard of some of these!

112 22.40% IE 7.0
112 22.40% Firefox 3.6
88 17.60% IE 8.0
43 8.60% Firefox 3.5
37 7.40% Safari 4.0
27 5.40% Chrome 4.0
20 4.00% Firefox 3.0
16 3.20% BlackBerry 0
10 2.00% IE 6.0
8 1.60% iPod Touch 0
6 1.20% iPhone 0
5 1.00% Default Browser 0
3 0.60% Firefox 2.0
2 0.40% Google Wireless Transcoder 0
2 0.40% Chrome 5.0
2 0.40% msnbot-media 1.1
2 0.40% Android 0
1 0.20% Snap 0
1 0.20% AOL 7.0
1 0.20% Googlebot-Image 0
1 0.20% Safari 3.2
1 0.20% Rippers 0

How some of you freak found us! And some that make you say WTFandango???????

15.09% real world venus vs mars
5.66% venus vs mars
3.77% what makes a man tick
3.77% jealousy between spouses and best friends
3.77% feeling unappreciated relationship
1.89% jealous of my spouse's ex husband
1.89% spouse boundary issues with other women
1.89% similarities of venus and mars for kids
1.89% Seperation dating no sex absence heart grow fonder
1.89% husband jealous of male friend
1.89% teasing husband ideas
1.89% provocative wife tease
1.89% marrying someone no spark
1.89% resentful wife with kids
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1.89% tease your father
1.89% Wife jealous of my best friend
1.89% feeling unappreciated in a 5 months relationship
1.89% toenail slave
1.89% mars and venus and unemployment
1.89% resentful wife
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1.89% my husband is jealous of my male friend
1.89% perfect world venus pets having cold
1.89% does separation make the heart grow fonder fight
1.89% Why Working Mothers Envy Stay-At-Home Dads
1.89% spouse addicted to WoW
1.89% Southern Sage Hottie
1.89% why I decide to divorce and how about my kids
1.89% wife makes money resentment
1.89% real world mars vs. venus
1.89% wife male best friend husband jealousy
1.89% Astronaut MARS VIENUS WWW.COM
1.89% jealous of my wifes first sexual encounter
1.89% "teasing husband with another man"
1.89% venus when she takes off her cloak
1.89% real world venus vs.mars
1.89% resentment therapy
1.89% what to do about inlaws that don't call their grandchildren on their birthday
1.89% why am i jealous of my wife's femal friends
1.89% Why do guys think it is okay to go out and get wasted every weekend while you are pregnant?

WHere you freaks live

412 82.40% United States United States
31 6.20% Canada Canada
27 5.40% United Kingdom United Kingdom
6 1.20% Australia Australia
4 0.80% India India
3 0.60%
2 0.40% New Zealand New Zealand
2 0.40% Norway Norway
1 0.20% Malaysia Malaysia
1 0.20% Finland Finland
1 0.20% France France
1 0.20% South Africa South Africa
1 0.20% Germany Germany
1 0.20% Mexico Mexico
1 0.20% Vietnam Vietnam
1 0.20% Switzerland Switzerland
1 0.20% Russian Federation Russian Federation
1 0.20% Egypt Egypt
1 0.20% Trinidad And Tobago Trinidad And Tobago
1 0.20% Sweden Sweden
1 0.20% Europe Europe

Hope your weekend was good!

Friday, April 16, 2010

Meet The Blogger: or our resident Islander--ANJENY!


Name: Anjeny

Age: 38

Kids #, age & sex: 7 kids, three girls and four boys, ages 18, 16, 14, 12, 9, 7 & 3

Marital status: married

1. How many years in your current relationship: 18 years...will be celebrating 19th year next month
2. Have you ever been divorced?: Nope

***If so how many times?:

3. What do you do for work: I'm a stay-at-home mom

4. Education: Two year college

5. Blogs you contribute to: The Real World: Venus vs Mars, Book Club 4 Kids, & Laie Elementary
main blog: Ramblings of an Islander

6. Religion: LDS

7. Political affiliation- (republican, democrat, libertarian): Republican

8. Basic philosophical leanings (liberal, conservative, confused): Conservative

9. What is your motto in life?: "Live a honest and respectful life"...this is too broad but it entails a lot more meaning than enclosed.

10. Who has had the most influence in your life?: Jesus...after all I'm trying to live my life the way he taught and lived and of course my mom...I've never realized what a wonderful, self-sacrificing woman she was until I've moved away from home.

11. Why did you start Blogging? (100 words or less): I started blogging November of 2008. One of my best friends started blogging and she loved it so much she kept telling me to start one for myself. I admit, I had no clue what blogging is until I started reading her blog, and then started reading another friend who I found out blogged too and then next thing I know, I was reading other people's blogs on their blogroll and then decided to start one just to unload some of the thoughts that go through my head (which I haven't been doing lately). I also love the fact that if I'm blogging about how my family is doing here, I don't really need to write one of those yearly letters to relatives and friends, if they want to know what's happening in my family's life, they can just go online and get updates. Actually, I wrote a post about this very question so if interested, go here.

*What is the most favorite post you have written on any blog you contribute to?: I wrote a tribute post on this blog created by the infamous Crash last February on my mom's birthday...that I found to be my most favorite.

12. Tell us in 100 words about your current relationship:
My current relationship...hmmmmm, that is a book to write about....LOL. I am currently married as I've already stated. I married the only guy I ever fell in love with. I always describe our marriage as a roller-coaster ride..we have our ups and downs, there are points in our marriage where we feel like we're diving into the unknown, such adrenaline rush..LOL and then there are times where we actually thought we've figured it out but of course, the cycle starts all over again, we go up and then we come down. Although my hub and I agree on a lot of major views, like our kids for example, our personalities tend to clash sometimes and there are certain issues we don't agree upon. Sometimes we compromise on certain things, other times we just agree to disagree.

One of the difference in personalities we have is where my hub gets angry easily, he is also easily to forgive and forget. I, on the other hand, can be very emotional at times may take me a while to get angry but once I did, it would take me a long time to forgive and forget. Yes, our marriage is definitely a working progress, we have our good and happy times and then the not so good and sad moments but we're both willing to keep working at it.

13. BONUS or OPTIONAL: Tell us something we need to know about you that we haven't covered above. 50 words or less: mean I have to voluntarily give you more informations about me...come on Shelle, you're going to have to do better than that. LOL

Since this is optional, I'm opting to not tell more than you asked but if you're looking for bonus, I'm gonna let you throw some questions my way...heck, get real dirty or gory if you want...if you throw it my way and dare me, I'd definitely be obligated to accommodate you...hahahah.

Shelle Edit: Well you HEARD her guys! Ask Anjeny questions and get dirty or gory but just remember to wash your mind and tongue out with soap afterwards ;) Anjeny I can explain in one word-HOME. I know weird right? But it is how I feel when I read her writing. I feel a constant. Don't get me wrong, she is completely unpredictable when she writes, you never know what experience she will put in her writing to relate it to the topic at hand... but she's constant in the fact that she's real. I relate to her relationship. She's happy and loves her husband but she shows that it isn't all roses, but that marriage comes with thorns and she's not afraid to tell us about them, but she also remembers to tell us how she overcame them...constant, safe the best kind of HOME. We love you Anj... thanks for contributing for us!!!


Thursday, April 15, 2010

He Said, She Said - Romance

Today's topic is romance: What exactly is romance? And is it overrated? Donna of The Bare Essentials Today and Brian of The Cheek of God offer their opinions, so read on . . .

SHE said:

Romance is overrated

Romance (n., adj.) a fictitious tale of wonderful and extraordinary events characterized by a non-realistic and idealizing use of the imagination. An exaggeration or fabrication that has no real substance.

Our culture has defined romance as the ultimate experience in an intimate relationship. It's idealized as the euphoria of being "in love." When, in reality, it doesn't have anything to do with love, but more so with having your personal needs met. It becomes the catalyst for having certain needs met, while not having to define or put a label on those needs.

If you're already having your "personal needs" met in any relationship you're in, where is the need for this fictitious tale or this grandiose display of affection?

I guess I'm just a simple kind of gal. A desirous look into my eyes. A simple I love you. I don't need any over-the-top gestures to let me know that I'm needed and wanted. And I guess to some those would be considered romantic gestures, but I think they should be part of the norm, rather than the exception.

I just Googled "romantic gestures" and these are a few of the gems that I came up with:

1) Do the laundry - really? I would expect that from a partner.

2) Write a message with a bar of soap on the mirror - Who's gonna clean that up?

3) Unwind with a glass of wine - Again another given.

4) Share things about your work day - It's called dialogue. And work? Not really so romantic!

5) Change her oil - Really?

6) Go grocery shopping - No comment.

7) Pay her a compliment in front of people you know - Again, no comment.

8) Help with or do the dishes - I would expect that. (Maybe I expect too much!)

9) Have a quickie somewhere new - Hot, but definitely not romantic.

10) Express appreciation for specific things your partner does for you - Again, a Thank You would be expected.

11) Be his/her slave for a day - Again, could be hot but there's nothing romantic about that. Slave is such an undermining term.

Maybe I'm too jaded. Maybe it's because I'm single right now. But none of these seem like they are worth the effort or would mean as much to me as a gesture that I would just expect to come naturally in a relationship (I love you, winks, soft touches, etc.). Well, maybe the quickie someplace new ;)

I once dated this guy who lived by the book The 5 Love Languages. He quizzed me on it during our first date and apparently by my answers he concluded that I thought like a dude. Maybe he was right.

What do you consider romantic?

HE said:

Methinks Donna made up that definition of romance, based on her experiences, and I sort of like it. And yet I must (or rather, the nature of this type of post forces me to) disagree. Romance isn't some "exaggeration or fabrication that has no real substance." I believe instead that there is a very real, substantial, and yet ultimately mysterious element within genuine romance. To wit, I'll offer my favorite definition, straight from the American Heritage English Dictionary:

romance (n.) - A mysterious or fascinating quality or appeal, as of something adventurous, heroic, or strangely beautiful.

In short, I believe romance isn't just something we do, it is also, more importantly, something that is a part of us. And romance often manifests itself in ways that are not so easily pinpointed.

Looking back at Donna's list of romantic gestures, a cautionary theme emerges: Be wary of any guy who does such things - especially when they are actions he typically doesn't perform - for, in the end, he did it all for the nookie, and such actions ultimately lead to disappointment and heartache. In the same vein, Kevin Leman once wrote that Sex Begins in the Kitchen. And while the book makes some interesting points, the overall message - that intimacy can be cultivated by the things we do - is too simplistic. Too pragmatic. For if we do things only to get things, then isn't that merely manipulation?

That dog don't hunt. And perhaps it's because of people who believed this tripe, and tried to apply these principles in their relationships with Donna, that she has become so jaded. (My apologies, Donna, on behalf of right-thinking men everywhere.)

So what am I getting at?

In gearing up to write this post, I did a bit of research. (See, Shelle!? I may write these posts on the day they are due, but I usually preface my writing with a modicum of preparation ;-) I stopped by my local Barnes & Noble and perused the magazine rack, seeking some current thoughts on romance and relationships from a man's perspective. I flipped through recent issues of GQ, Esquire, Men's Journal. Even Maxim. And while the pictures were lovely, and I do occasionally enjoy reading about camping, technology, style and fitness, there was nary a solid piece of relationship advice to be found. I even dove into family- and relationship-oriented magazines like Family Fun and Parenting and came up empty.

And then I saw it! "Make Me Laugh: Humor and Romance" on the cover of . . . Scientific American Mind?!


Here are the bullet points from science writer Christie Nicholson's article, titled "The Humor Gap:"

1) When seeking a mate, men desire women who laugh at their jokes, whereas women prefer men who can make them laugh.

2) Once a man and a woman are in a relationship, humor roles change.

This article confirmed for me two very obvious things about my relationship with my wife:

1) She was immediately hooked after I guzzled root beer floats and shoved pizza up my nose. Witnessing me at my slapstick best, she loved me anyway and gave me a shot.

2) Her enduring sense of humor made my recent extended period of unemployment tolerable. In fact, I can safely say that she saved my life on more than one occasion, simply by reaching down into my depths (she refuses to go there with me) and lifting me up with her tried-and-true, one-two combination of compassion and encouragement, both tinged with her own subtle, humorous touch.

As we've grown old together, humor has been the constant fuel for our romantic fire. Initially, I was the comedian and she my willing audience. She laughed at me, and I dug her laughter. Now, we share inside jokes, the punchlines of which are ours alone. And none of this is the result of any particular thing we've done. It's who we are. There is no exaggeration there. Only the reality of two lives merged into one. Two roads that lead toward a common goal:


So, as I've defined it, romance is indeed necessary - even if not so easily pigeonholed - and far from overrated. For those that would be romantic, there must be the realization that romance transcends actions. Accordingly, romance goes beyond having your personal needs met. Those things come with the proper foundation is laid. And the foundation is not made merely of the things you do, but by the stuff of which you are. And relationships built on the right stuff will stand . . .

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

What would you Rather episode 3

What Would You Rather:

It's that time again. Choose one or the other(it make it more fun that way--NO FENCE SITTING)-- Answer just one of them or all of them! Comment and then follow so you can comment on other people's comments! :)

Chew a piece of toenail off a your spouses dirty foot, or throughly lick their unshowered armpit?


Admit that you once commited a horrible crime, do the time in prison, and get on with your life, or never admit it to anyone, live an honest life from then on, and deal with the guilt?

This one is just for the MEN:

As a man, wake up to find you have grown nonremovable D cup breasts or that your testicles have disappeared?

This one is just for WOMEN:

As a woman have your boobs drop 6 inches overnight or your butt drop 6 inches overnight? (this question found here)

Sunday, April 11, 2010

The IT Factor...he's got it.

You should click on the video and let it play while you read this post because I'm sure when my husband listens to country (which is practically never) he dedicates this song to me. (bwahahaha) Cause let's face it he should be writing this post about me! ;) Click HERE for official video!

When did I know my spouse had the IT factor?

I was 18 when I met him.

At that time boys or men or guys were more a tool than anything else. Not a tool as in they bugged me but a tool as in they helped me... hehehe in the best way possible.

Guys for me were more for FREE movies, dinners, rides, clothes, travel, help with homework, and for a feel good make out session every once in a while. I also had a select few guys that were more the brother-friend type that I hung out with all.the.time. but could and would never think of doing anything more with then just be really good friends because that would be like doing MORE with your brother... and that's just wrong (plus I was never their type, as they eventually found out).

I didn't really NOTICE my husband at first. He was just another guy that started to hang around my group of friends. In fact, one day at a football game we both attended he attempted to say HI to me and I had NO idea who he was at first, and as soon as it dawned on me how I knew him (while giving him the nice HI-back-but-I-don't-know-you nod and smile) I still couldn't remember his name.

But that didn't last long. He came around so often that soon he became almost one of the girls. It would be my close girlfriends and I and HIM. My other girlfriend put first "I like him don't touch dibs" on him so I didn't go the "do I like him route". She called him... it was hands off for me.

But soon enough my girlfriend started dating someone else and with some betting late one night my husband and I had our first date planned. The date wasn't anything incredibly spectacular--he was MR. Tuesday in an abnormal string of dates that week (one every day and two on Saturday), but he was the hottest and we never wanted for conversation. One of my worst pet peeves was that usually with the cute guys I always had to keep up the conversation and although I don't mind hearing myself talk, it was still exhausting and boring once I ran out of things to ask and say.
So I knew he was hot, to me anyway and all my girlfriends, so he was good eye candy. We could talk until the wee hours of the morning and I wasn't the only one talking! He was funny--man was and IS he funny with quick wit (AND he laughed at my jokes, or at me, either way he seemed to get me) nothing else brought me quicker to crushing on a guy then quick wit, someone who could REALLY make me laugh out loud! If you have ever read my other blog you would know how into my religion I am... well so is he... and that was a definite turn on.

There is more but this is getting long and I probably lost half of you at paragraph two.

The IT factor came during the first kiss. True Story.

He had everything else, but when I knew I could spend the rest of my life with the guy (because I PROMISE you that marriage was the furthest from my mind) was when he kissed me.

Let me just say, the man can kiss.

And not just kiss, but like forget-what-you-were-saying-or-thinking kind of kiss, like limbs-go-weak kind of kiss, and I could never get enough.

After our first kiss I'll be honest, I never wanted to do much of anything else. I was not an unseasoned kisser. Sure I was a virgin in other aspects (like sex) but I was very practiced in the art of kissing and making out--let me not lie to you, I was a super slut when it came to kissing.

How very vain and selfish of me right? He had everything else but I never thought about spending any more time with him then the other guys until our first kiss. And being the gentleman (or wuss) that he is, he waited to kiss me. It took 3 MONTHS if I remember right!!! He blames it on moving away so we were long distance and he wasn't sure he wanted to lead me on since we were living far away from each other at the time... (rolls eyes) :)

Anyway... the IT factor, he's got it.

What about you guys? When did YOU know your partner had that IT factor? Was it the way they treated you? Was it their minds? What was it?

Stats, Funnies

Robert watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter, asked Robert 'Giving up?'


Where you clicked.


Search terms, these always tickle me.

3 8.57% how to keep from feeling underappreciated as a wife
2 5.71% sexmen tarzan
2 5.71% jealous of husband's friend
1 2.86% wife teasing husband with another man
1 2.86% Cable guys are unappreciated
1 2.86% my wife feels jealous when i talk to others
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1 2.86% sexy/provocative texts to send your man while he's at work
1 2.86% sex everyday
1 2.86% the real world venus vs mars
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1 2.86% jealous of husband's friend who doesn't like me
1 2.86% sexmen.blogspot
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1 2.86% teasing things to text a guy
1 2.86% best friend versus spouse
1 2.86% my inlaws are disappointed in their grandchildren
1 2.86% do anything for spouse friend
1 2.86% failure rate of dna paternity tests
1 2.86% why is my wife jealous of my male friend
1 2.86% HONEY-DO LIST comics
1 2.86% feeling unappreciated relationship
1 2.86% should i settle for him
1 2.86% tease husband
1 2.86% my wife is jealous of my female friends
1 2.86% Venus vs Mars questions
1 2.86% resentful wife does not work
1 2.86% resentful wife
1 2.86% blogspot
1 2.86% @istockphoto darkscott

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Robert stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Robert?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'

Go see what Hotdads has going on! Caption Contest today!

Southern Sage <<< NSFW on Sunday

Hope y'alls weekend was excellent!

Friday, April 9, 2010

Honey Do... Something

Holy crap... I was just posting this funny video I found on the internet to my blog, and I remembered, 'Shit, I'm supposed to post to Venus v. Mars on Friday.' So maybe my procrastination in this post makes it entirely void! Or does it? The difference between Sexy Papa and myself: I remembered that something needed to be done, and even though I have been up since 4am, and I'm dead tired, I am being responsible and fulfilling my commitment.

OK, so I have this little problem. His name is Sexy Papa, and he is a horrible procrastinator. On top of that he is sort of a slob too. I don't ask much of him. Hey, I get it. He works a "real" job... yada yada yada! Not like I don't have 3 part time jobs, outside of motherhood. But whatever.

There are somethings I can't do around here, or that he would like me not to do... him being the man with the power tools and all. For instance, when my youngest daughters drawer front came off the drawer... I heard "Oh, I'll take care of that. I'll bring my drill home this week"

4 weeks later, and I am still looking at the broken drawer sitting in exactly the same place I left it. And I couldn't help but think 'Could you at least bring home the drill so I can fix it myself?'

This is the story of my married life. Before I met him, I did everything myself. I am the one who originally built the dresser. I could have fixed it. But I don't want to insult him. He gets irritated if I just skip the middle man and the hassle.

So tell me? Is this a common problem? "To do" lists sitting full for weeks or months? Is it just Sexy Papa? Or am I just being a crabby.... you know what?

Oh, and if you wanna check out that funny video...
Left Field Missy

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Honey Do List

The first time I heard of the phrase "Honey do list" was at work and that was just 5 years ago. After it was explained to me by a colleague, I thought about how my wife would get me to do things.

First of all, I am not mechanically inclined. Second of all, just thinking about doing a home DIY project scares me. Third of all, I'm smart enough to find a way out of doing things. She knows that she can't resort to tricks, so she resorts to tricks. Confusing? Hehe.

Her favorite tactic is to piss me off because I usually do not want to talk to her when I am mad and I do not like to sit in my chair and stew. She knows that this can backfire on her and it has few times.

Her second tactic is using the "We" method. Instead of saying "I need (blank)", statements like "We need milk" or "We need some potatoes" or "We need tampons"are used. Does that sound familiar to you guys? LOL

Next in line is asking me politely. I am a nice person and she knows that by asking me politely this way, it appeals to my nature and I want to help/please her. Close behind that is asking me sweetly when I am either in a good mood or in a bad mood.

Why do we curse/dread the Honey Do lists so much? We can blame our ancestors for not weeding out the hunter/gatherer genes. Too hard to suppress that naturally evolved instinct when we get to grunt and feel manly all over at the gatherer's request. ;)

How do you "trick" your spouse into getting that Honey Do List done?

Shelle's Note: DCHY has just started his blog click HERE. If you have ever wondered what it is like to raise a family and enjoy your spouse all while deaf, Daddy Can't Hear You will be just the blog for you. The posts all ready are just setting us up for some great blog go check him out and follow, it definitely will be interesting!

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

10 things I love and Hate about Duke

WHAT A PROMPT!  Why did I pick this one Shelle?! LMAO

Love and Hate are emotional extremes... and I don't do well with extremes as I am more of a middle of the road kinda gal.  However, I am going to give this my best shot cuz when it comes to Duke, I can usually eek out a pretty good post if I am able to bitch and moan a bit in the process.  I'm gonna go after it a bit differently though... CHIEF STYLE.

10. I love how he plays with my hair.
10. I hate how he has to twirl my hair at night to wind himself down enough to fall asleep.  Sometimes he twirls and twirls until it pulls my hair out.  Seriously, this childhood habit has gotten way out of hand!  Just because he is bald as a cue ball doesn't warrant me suffering through years of hair pulling!

9. I love that he is affectionate by nature.  Lotsa hugs for the boys by their dad is always a good thing.
9. I hate that he has to smack my ass, rub my head, grab a boob and pinch my cheek....  every time I walk past. DON'T TOUCH THE MERCHANDISE!

8. I love how he is in charge of the grocery shopping and making Dinner.
8. I hate that everything I eat tastes like cayenne pepper and ketchup (OK so sometimes he adds tuna)

7. I love that he is the designated driver for the family.
7. I hate that he never knows where he is going, never drives the speed limit (either 10 below or 10 above) and refuses to use his windshield wipers.

6. I love that he is frugal and refuses to incur debt.
6. I hate that he is a tightass. 10 cents for Kraft Macaroni and Cheese over the nasty Wal-Mart brand is not going to make or break his retirement nest egg.

5. I love that he doesn't care whether I am a good housekeeper or not.
5. I hate that he is such a pig, doesn't pick up his dirty underpants, or wash his whiskers down the sink when he shaves.

4. I love that he is a "mans, man" or whatever it means to when a dude is "all boy".
4. I hate that he has to grab himself, fist pump, pass gas, belch, hack loagies etc... to ensure no one makes the mistake of implying he is "Metro".

3. I love that he has a strong work ethic.
3. I hate that he refuses to call in sick when it is clear he is deathly ill or better yet, one of the kids gets sick and I have to be the one to stay home so he doesn't wreck his perfect attendance.   

2. I love that he tries to fix things on his own around the house to save money.
2. I hate that our faucets are on backwards, he torched a hole in my countertop, the garage door is bungeed together and only half of our sprinkling system is operational.

1. I love that he thinks I'm hysterical.
1. I hate that he only laughs when I make an ass out of myself trying to be funny.

What do you love/hate about Duke err I mean your significant other?

Come over and check me out at Hiding From the Kids 

Monday, April 5, 2010

Here's the order of my list that it's in . . .

It IS Monday, right?!


According to Our Fearless Leader, our topic today is:

Ten things my spouse does that I LOVE and 10 things about my spouse I HATE.

Let's see . . . Love/Hate. Very strong words. Love, I can handle. Hate? We'll see . . .

And this question is really looking for two very different kinds of responses. One is about doing, a very ethical sort of inquiry. The other is about essence. Actions vs. Being. Hmm . . .

Alrighty, then.


1) She is a great kisser. From the first clumsy effort, over piping hot pizza, I was hooked.

2) She asks questions . . . When it matters, she asks for clarification.

3) . . . but not too many questions. The devil is in the details, after all.

4) She makes kickass mashed potatoes.

5) And gravy.

6) She smiles a lot. It ties the room together.

7) She scrubs my back in the shower. Despite all the hair and age spots, I might add. And she uses a scrunchie. Score!

8) She volunteers. Whether it's building sets for the school play or helping the new art teacher get acclimated to Little Johnnie's Post Nasal Drip, she's on it. And never expects a Thank You.

9) She lets me drive. Even if it's merely over the river and through the woods, I get to sit in the Captain's Chair. And she feeds me cookies and chats me up to keep me awake.

10) She plays Guitar Hero. Even the really hard Tool songs. She immerses herself in the things others enjoy, and makes them that much more fun.


1) Her heart is large. She loves everyone. Even the people I tend to loathe with more than a small amount of passion. I wish she'd hate people more.

2) Her hands are tender. They touch things with a tenderness and compassion I often lack. I wish she'd smack me around more. (No, not like that!)

3) Her eyes are focused. She sees all and never looks away. I wish she'd blink every once in a while so I could get away with more stuff.

4) Her mind is young. Not in a childish way, but in an innocent way. I wish she'd share my frequent cynicism.

5) Her brain is sharp. She gets A's on Big Brain Academy. Me? I keep searching in vain for the pass/fail option.

6) Her feet are quick. She runs ahead, looking for adventure. I wish she'd stop for a minute and let me catch up.

7) Her lips are sealed. She refuses to gossip or belittle anyone. I wish she'd let fly more.

8) Her legs are strong. Harper legs, we call them. Hers carry the weight of it all and never grow weary. I wish she'd stumble occasionally.

9) Her ears are tuned. She hears the good and filters the bad. I wish she'd listen to me when I whine.

10) Her body is a temple. She looks great all the freaking time. I wish she'd get older already.

In sum: My mama didn't raise no fool. I do indeed know how to pick 'em, no?

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Happy Easter!

Hope y'all have a big ole Easter!

Come on now those are funny right there!!! CHeck the stats and some funnies below!

Happy Easter!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Stats, Funnies


Take off clothing and place it in sectioned
laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long robe.
If you see husband along the way,
be modest and smile pleasantly.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use wash cloth , long loofah,
wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for
10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut
and jaffa cake body wash .

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Rinse off.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long robe and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, be modest and smile pleasantly.


Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed
and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her
making the woo-hoo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.

Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.


Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry only butt cheeks and forearms.

Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was
hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor,
and light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her
and make the woo-hoo sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone who did not laugh at the truth behind this,
there is something SO very wrong with you.
Have a great day..... and woo-hwoo!!!


Where they click


Where they live.

400 80.00% United States United States
48 9.60% United Kingdom United Kingdom
29 5.80% Canada Canada
6 1.20% India India
4 0.80% Australia Australia
3 0.60% Philippines Philippines
3 0.60% Belgium Belgium
1 0.20% Germany Germany
1 0.20% Greece Greece
1 0.20% New Zealand New Zealand
1 0.20% Malaysia Malaysia
1 0.20% Saudi Arabia Saudi Arabia
1 0.20% France France
1 0.20% Iceland Iceland

HEHEHE How they found us!

5.88% venus older than mars
2.94% giving up on intimacy
2.94% If distance makes the heart grow fonder... then why do people get restraining orders?

2.94% when spouse finds you resentful
2.94% if v HATE someone,v tel it 2 evryone witout any fear.But if v LOVE someone, v fear even 2 tell d lov

2.94% tease my hubby
2.94% wife jealous of my female friends
2.94% when can an infant be diagnosed with autism
2.94% choose spouse over kids
2.94% spouse overly positive or negative
2.94% going over board for a prom dress
2.94% dont try to change your partner
2.94% negative comments from spouse
2.94% separation makes the heart grow fonder
2.94% i am jealous of husband's female friends
2.94% who should come first your spouse or best friend
2.94% touch my heart -song -music -lyrics
2.94% venus vs mars resturant
2.94% tease my husband
2.94% teasing sexy text examples
2.94% wiki "he said she said" therapy
2.94% i don't like my spouse's friend
2.94% how to tease a married man
2.94% venus & mars april 2 2010
2.94% jealous of spouse friends
2.94% just a little homework arthur
2.94% scary things about mars
2.94% teasing texts
2.94% i have a 3 year old and 6 year old - how do stay at home mom's split chores with working spouses?

2.94% husband is jealous of my male friend
2.94% spouse jealous of friends
2.94% tease my man
2.94% tease a man by email


Little Vito was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after

another. After the 6th one, a man on the bench across from him said to him,

"Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you

acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."

Little Vito replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."

The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"

Little Vito answered, "No He minded his own business".

Y'all have a big ole Easter!

Friday, April 2, 2010

He is Negative

I guess this is one of those post where I have to spill the UGLY beans about hub, eh...LOL. For all his wonderful and lovable attributes, my hub, I'm sad to say can be a very negative guy. I've noticed that more lately and it's starting to kinda wear on our conversation time. I know that there's a reason for it but that doesn't stop me from grinding my teeth sometimes.

It isn't that he's negative about everything, though. There's just one subject that constantly come up in our conversation and pretty much everything he said about that subject is negative, and that is our neighbors. Since we've moved to our current residence, we've been having some major issues with our neighbors.

So anyways, because of some of the things that our neighbors have been doing, seems like every time my hub and I are alone and we're talking about something, doesn't matter what the subject is, he always managed to bring it around to our neighbors so practically our conversation would end up on the topic of our neighbors. Most of the time, I'm screaming in head saying..


I've come to the point where I now have to screen our topic of conversations. If we are going out on a date, and driving to the place of our destination, I usually am the one trying to come up with some safe topics where I was sure it wouldn't circle back to a negative conversation about our neighbors. Of course, it doesn't work all the time. Sometimes he would beat me to the bunch and before I know it, he's going on and on about our neighbor. Sometimes I change the subject when I'm not too lazy(LOL) or I just crawl into my own thoughts and just let him have at it.

And no, it doesn't matter how many times I've told him that there are just things he really can't control and that he needs to just ignore what he can't change and move on with his life.

What about you guys? Which one of you is the negative/positive one in your relationship?

{Shelle, sorry that it took me this long for this post and thanks for your patience.}