The professionals who wrote this section are: David Yarian www.DavidYarian.com and www.SpiritedLoving.com ~And~ Shanna Katz, M.Ed Resident Sexuality Educator and Online Media Specialist www.FunLove.com and www.ShannaKatz.com
The ONE thing women want (which is a bit like deciding right now which ONE food you will happily consume for therest of your natural life) just happens to be the same ONE thing men want!
I believe women—and men—simply want to be wanted. We want to be desired, and not only sexually. We want our opinions, our wishes, our needs and our yearnings to be solicited and taken to heart. We don’t need slaves or servants, but we do relish the thrill that comes when our Beloved looks at us in that certain way that communicates his/her genuine interest, their fundamental acceptance and that tad of loving skepticism that keeps us honest.
The stereotype is, of course, that men only want Sex and women only want Love, and that is why there has been trouble for millennia, probably since before Aristophanes penned Lysistrata. Therapists add their twist to this myth by opining that men want to have sex in order to feel loved, and women want to feel loved in order to have sex. I submit that these are but two sides of the same coin—that what we all really want is to be really wanted—for who we truly are.
Okay so that is what the experts say... what do you have to add or say about that?
Let us know in comments! Hope ya'll had a good week! :)
Shelle
7 comments:
The author is 100% correct. It's all I want and lately it's been more elusive than a Unicorn.
I don't know how to expound on this any more then to say YUP.
Sex. love. being wanted...........all go together. It's what makes the whole experience COMPLETE.
otherwise, sex is just sex
and you can't love if you dont WANT the person
and if you don't fell wanted, then you don't feel loved, and therefore NO SEX FOR YOU BUDDY
Sorry about the delete, I had a MAJOR error that changed the entire post....had to fix it...
Well, I agree. One of the big issues in my marriage is the fact that there is a standard set by my wife and her cultish religion that I am expected to live up to.
I have no wish to be that guy...I tried and nearly killed myself. SO, when she treats me like a social leaper, I want noting to do with her.
When I want noting to do with her, she does not want sex. When I don't get sex I feel unwanted so I withdraw more.
It got better after my breakdown and near divorce, but I have noticed all the religious shit slowly creeping back in....and it's starting again.
Isn't it funny that 3 guys named Kenny posted comments? Guess who's the 3rd? :)
I agree with the author, even though it may be a bit oversimplified. While the stereotype may fit while looking at relationships as a whole, considering the couple itself will show you a very dynamic flux between what they think love and being wanted looks like at any given point.
we all really want is to be really wanted—for who we truly are.
AMEN!
I'll just comment with my agreement... everyone wants love - some express it a little differently and I don't think it's ALWAYS divided along the gender lines.
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