Thursday, May 20, 2010

Just Jules- Chores

What is one chore you do based on gender roles that
you wish your spouse would do?

I do the things in and around the house.
He does the things outside of the house- as in work and business.

Lawn work, house work, garbage, and minor car things are my responsibility.
Kids, pets, and minor broken things mine.
Why? Because he is gone. Never home.
Working - teaching from 7-3:15, our business until about 10 pm or later this time of year.
How can one do things around the house when they are not here? I've discussed this before, but with that comes a lot of unassumed things like chores. Since I do most of the chores I can not pick by gender, rather I will pick the one I appreciate the least.....the garbage and recycling.

I grew up with my dad or brothers taking care of the garbage. To me it was a "guys" job. I wasn't really raised with guy and girl roles per say- in fact I aced driver's ed (which was part of the curriculum back then) because I was the only one in class that knew how to change a tire and was willing to demonstrate it.

The garbage though used to be a thorn in my side. We did not discuss before getting together who would do what, and we kind of fell into our roles. He got off easy I am afraid because I was trying to prove something - I wanted to show him how much I could do. Big Big Mistake ;)

Just because I can do them does not mean I want to!!!!! Not all the time anyway.

Garbage day rolls around now and I am scrambling to get the house trash collected, litter box emptied, kid's rooms gone through for trash, a quick look through the fridge to get any spoiled food (which I leave in a pile in the back until garbage day so the dogs don't get into it in the trash) and I am running out to the end of the dirt road to get the cans there before the collector comes.

This in itself is a luxury- one I have afford myself just the last few years. Up until that point I collected it all and took bi-monthly trips to the dump -which is free. After gas prices went higher it was no longer worth the long drive to the dump and the collection was cheaper (and easier).

My best friend still jokes about garbage day - "What delightful outfit did the garbage men see you in today Jules???" she jokes. This is because I am usually dragging cans in my pajamas- bottoms falling off, no bra, hair astray! a mess really.

Then there is the recycling. The garbage man does not take this. I can fill the back of the van every other week with our paper and container recycling. We recycle all paper and all possible containers. This is a trip into town and through the industrial park to the bins.

Sigh.............. so, if I had to chose a duty for my man to take over it would be trash duty - cuz after all THAT IS a guy's job right??

You can find me most days over HERE
at Just Jules (although it has been hit or miss lately)

p.s. I am finding a fix to this. I have three boys - yep three. They are getting old enough to take care of the trash~! Hallelujah!


Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I totally hate trash also. AND even though my hubs worked AND went to school AND would get home at midnight sometimes after studying only to have to get up the next morning early to GO TO school.

I'd still make him take out the trash.

Hey if I have to clean his pee of the toilet, it's the least he can do.

I will let it pile and pile and pile up. I'm stubborn that way. Although, now it's is not an issue because he knows I won't take it out.

NOW... this doesn't mean I've NEVER taken it out. If he mentions to me that he absolutely cannot do it all... I may help by gathering a trash or to, to carry out. ;)

Good post girl!

The Servant said...

All I know was in the time it took to get this blog written combined with the time it took you two to post and respond that's at least two more loads of dishes that didn't get done.

binks said...

Jules, you are funny. I totally put the spoiled food in the freezer for trash day.
Helps ward off the racoons. (I don't feel so weird after all.)
We are lucky to have a giant wheeled city container to roll out on trash day.
But, alas, it stays faithfully parked behind our fence most days the garbage truck rolls by.

My hubby and I both work, so its basically, all chores - all the time for both of us.
He usually cooks because, frankly, he is a better cook. (and I never do it right)
He cleans the litter box because the cats are HIS.
The thing that bugs me the most?
When I do his laundry (we usually do our own), I make sure his stuff is hung up or neatly folded for him to put away.
When he does any of mine, I get a laundry basket of wrinkled mess.
What is up with that??

binks said...

AND I know that all of you are wondering WHY we do our own laundry.

I once washed (accidently) a red shirt with the underwear and turned his socks pink.

He dries everything on HIGH and shrinks my clothes.

Anonymous said...

Your description of yourself taking the garbage out--that was me this a.m. hauling the trash & recycling out to the curb. LOL. Happily, it was early enough that only one of my neighbors spotted me and waved from a distance.

We're lucky, as the collection we pay for covers bi-weekly pick-up (cuts down on the odor in the blazing hot summer) and curbside recycling once every 2 weeks. The dump here isn't free, nor is it anywhere nearby. Mind you, not that you'd catch me signing up to haul our garbage there even if it were. My olfactory senses and my gag reflex are both too strong for that. No wonder you hate taking out the trash!

Bossy Betty said...

Yes. Yes. It is the man's job.

Unknown said...

I know it is the mans job...but like Jules spouse mine is never home. And if I do say hey the TRASH is full! He just shoves it down farther to fit in more stuff. OI!

For the last three Thursdays (our once weekly trash pick-up) he's been out of town. Go Figure. So I gotta lug it all down the driveway plus two recycle bins (did I mention my front yard/driveway is a hill?)

He does cook (if he's home which is rare these days) and he does do all the outdoor yard stuff. I do wish he could learn how to use a vacuum or a mop. That would make my year!

TisforTonya said...

I had to physically stop myself from running outside to make sure ManOfTheHouse had taken out the garbage... then I remembered that it isn't until tomorrow.

He does usually do it, but when he forgets I don't care too much - but then, I only have to drag the wheeled cans about 15 feet on a paved surface... and I've been known to do it while gripping my robe shut so I don't give the garbage men a free show.

Margaret said...

I totally thought that was why we had children - to take over the chores we didn't want to do. At least that's what I am teaching my boys.

For the most part, I take care of everything in the house and the Man takes care of everything outside of the house. Unless I ask him to do something inside the house (cooking or dishes). And unless I get a wild hair up my ass and do something myself outside (cleaning up the yards so he can mow). *shrug*


Just Jules said...

alright everyone- I am finally back. I was taking pics of someone this a.m.

Shelle- my house would be one stinkin mess cuz we would get into a stubborn match

Servant - really? pretty sure you are speaking about yourself right? that you could have gotten 2 loads of MY dishes done for me? that is so kind :)

binks- that may work now but if and when kids come into the game I would start thinking of a new game plan now. (cuz they don't do their own laundry - sigh)

Anon- it did get pretty gaggy in the summer especially if I put the collection off and the bags got maggoty

BB- it should be the man's job

Andrea- If I had a cook all complaints would be done... heaven!!!!

T- sorry to psych you out

Margaret- I am working on getting the boys to do it (that is the goal)

Anonymous said...

I see the womens liberation movement is completely dead.

Anjeny said...

Nobody likes garbage..LOL.

I have my boys take the garbage out. I've had them doing it since they started Kindergarten, of course, I started them small and as they get older, I had them do the bigger ones, like putting the garbage out on the curb and taking our kitchen garbage out..that is usually our worst one in the house that nobody wants to touch.

Before the boys started on that, my hub was pretty good at doing it himself.

Jules, when your boys start taking the trash out and putting the garbage can out for the garbage man, it will be indeed heaven for you...bribery speed things up a bit, just saying..LOL.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Servant-- come on, we are women, either those things were already done or we were doing both at the same time! Duh!

Binks!!! Binks!!! How I've missed thee!!!

Chief said...

Wont do it... nope

if I gotta let the shit pile up for weeks in front of the house...

Train em early.... although they may not always so it right as I describe in my post today (coincidentally)

heelsnstocking said...

the bathrooms! and we have 3 of the darn things, thats my job along with the ironing, which i dont mind as I flick on the tv and shut the door, everyone avoids me so they dont have to help so a win win situation for me!

binks said...

Jules: Did you mention maggots??
Totally made my skin crawl just thinking about it.

There ain't no more kids in this girl's future.
Kid (singular) has come and gone.
Did the single mom thing for years on end and (sort of) trained the boy to tote the pail to the street.
It was easier to just do what needed to be done than spend 2 hours debating the reasons why boy could not.

It is nice to have someone to actually share the load
(and I do have to admit, the hubby does the lion's share of garbage duty)

Its just that damn laundry thing.....

Shelle - I've missed you too!!!!!! Its been a rough year.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

Currently my hubs is in charge of laundry and since I don't have to do it I deal with having to find which basket he put what clean clothes in! :)

Binks! So sorry to hear you had a hard year :(

Missty said...

Ok, I have four boys and a husband - I see no need in me doing any garbage duties, yard duties or garage duties. If I have to do any of the above... everyone is in trouble. LOL

But then again, I am at home, and I do all the cooking, cleaning and laundry, errands, etc.

The problem with having kids do these chores is - just as they are old enough to help out, etc. They get into sports, etc and for a short time they can do both - by the time they are in high school, it is slim if you see them. LOL

So it falls back on to my husband, who is busy, yet still does them for me.

Mrs.Duran said...

I am a stay at home mom and so that means I do EVERYTHING!!! Laundry,Dishes,Cooking,Moping and I even take the trash out! Do I want to NO!! but I was like Shelle and I would just let it pile up and I would get another trash bag out and fill that one up and so on and so and the next thing I would have like 4 trash bags! So I stopped fighting it and started taking it out. Now I dont take it to the street for trash pick up he can at least do one chore, my goodness!!! He would do the dishes for me but it drove me crazy that he wouldnt wash all the dishes he would leave the big ones in the sink to " soak " and I would just end up washing them my self. He does try but I just end up going in after him and fix whatever he didnt do!! Guess I am stuck in my ways!!!

Just Jules said...

Sage - I never asked for Women's Lib to live on in my house

Anj- I am working on getting the boys to do the trash, I usually only remember as the bus is coming and it is too late. part of being a stay at home mom, I lose track of days

Chief- you'd die of maggot infestation if you lived in my house then

heels- I really don't mind cleanign bathrooms, but i have started paying to have my pressing done. it is worth the $20 or $30 a month

binks - well then have at it if the kids are gone..... (just jealous, my hubby actually is much better at laundry then me)

Shelle- if he did laundry I would find the basket (as long as he didn't shrink my stuff)

Missty - I am working on the boys... I am not a good chore manager I fear

615- See being stuck in your ways is only giving him an out. Just like kids - send them back to redo it, they learn faster that way.

kyooty said...

hehe we have free garbage collection and recycling collection. Hubbie just drags it out to the curb every Tuesday. If he forgets I will pull it down there if I remember, it not it can wait a week. :)