"My husband lost his salesman job 8 and 1/2 months ago. I was lucky and was able to go back to a good job that paid well, has insurance, and keeps us relatively living the same as we are use to. It's tight but we are better off than a lot of people out there. Sounds great right?
Well here is my problem. This was to be a temporary fix, me working full-time (4-10 hour days), until he got another job, then I wanted to go to part-time or stay at home altogether like I have been doing for the last 5 years.
The longer he is out of a job, the less he looks for one and is content staying home. I'm not complaining one bit about the job he does as a stay-at-home Dad. He's actually quite incredible at it. The thing is, is it was not our deal and I am resentful. I want to be at home. Every time I approach the topic he gets defensive about it, saying things like, 'You think I like not being able to provide for my family?' Which in return makes me feel guilty for rubbing salt in the wound and then I go back to feeling resentful, I know he is running around taking care of our 3 kids all day, but I feel he is being lazy with the job search not at all giving it his full effort. This IS the only thing we ever argue about and it's starting to wear on me.
I need help on how I approach this with him. What's the best way to approach a guy who thinks I'm attacking his pride? Am I wrong for wanting our roles switched back to the way they were? Any suggestions for a resentful wife?"
***If you have any questions or problems that you would like to have addressed in Group Therapy please email me at blokthoughts@gmail dot com or realworldvenusmars @ gmail dot com.
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