Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Group Therapy: Women have the power.


We don't have a write in today but I found an interesting article HERE that says Women have the POWER in the relationship, kind of. Here is an exert from the article. Do you agree with it?

"The study at least suggests that the marriage is a place where women can exert some power," said Vogel. "Whether or not it's because of changing societal roles, we don't know. But they are, at least, taking responsibility and power in these relationships. So at least for relatively satisfied couples, women are able to take some responsibility and are able to exert some power -- but it's hard for us to say why that's so."

"Women are responsible for overseeing the relationship -- making sure the relationship runs, that everything gets done, and that everybody's happy," said Murphy, "And so, maybe some of that came out in our findings in terms of women domineering and dominating -- that they were taking more responsibility for the relationship, regardless of whose topic was being discussed.

Vogel said that wives weren't simply talking more than their husbands in discussions, but actually were drawing favorable responses from their husbands to what they said.

"That's what I think was particularly interesting," he said. "It wasn't just that the women were bringing up issues that weren't being responded to, but that the men were actually going along with what they said. They (women) were communicating more powerful messages and men were responding to those messages by agreeing or giving in."

"There's been research that suggests that's a marker of a healthy marriage -- that men accept influence from their wives," said Murphy."

What about your guys' marriages or relationships? Does this apply to you? Women do you see yourself as the one exhibiting your man to "give in" and MEN what do you think about that? Does this ring true?

***We would love to hear from you guys! If you have something you want discussed in Group Therapy email me at blokthoughts @ gmail dot com-- Subject: Group Therapy.

Comment, follow comments, come back and discuss others comments, and feel free to comment anonymously!


Anonymous said...

Well now it looks just about like what Big Pappi said about training....

Exactly the same actually.

Go Me.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I can see that being true and being a healthy relationship as long as a woman doesn't dominate or domineer because a man was taught to be respectful... does that make sense?

Some women and men feel that bit of power and abuse it...

I'm watching it happen in a relationship right now of someone I know... it sucks.

But I see the truth in this!!!

Training huh Sage? I guess it is YAY you! heh.

Meagan@Megs7827 said...

Why is it weird that men are agreeing with their wives? Hello, we are smart! I was an only child in a family that talked a lot. We ate dinner together every night and had wonderful conversations. I can give my husband another point of view. That is what I am there for. He needs me to help him make decisions and talk through things.

April said...

I don't find this true in my relationship. I honestly would say that things are even. Neither of us are dominate.

Daddy Geek Boy said...

Neither of us are the dominant person in the relationship. At least not overall. But my constant question to her is "Are you okay? Is there anything I can do?"

Anonymous said...

I like to think that my spouse and I are partners working together. We each have our own strengths, which complement each other more often than not. I would say that we share in the power of the relationship. As a woman, I do appreciate that he respects me and my opinions, even though we may not always agree.

If it is a situation regarding the kids, we always talk it out and come to agreement (even if it has to be over the phone). That way we present a united front.

Regarding the statement about "the marker of a healthy marriage", I think that both partners need to accept influence from the other in order for each to feel valued and satisfied.

Joanna Cake said...

Recently on Desperate Housewives, Tom Scavo was taken to task by an older man because he seemed to defer to his wife, Lynette, about everything.

Later, Tom explained about Lynette's childhood, the death of her father and having to cope with an alcoholic mother. She had brought up the other children and felt the need to control everything to make sure that everyone was safe. He said his role in the marriage was to make Lynette feel safe and if that meant allowing her to make all the decisions, then he regarded that as his job because he loved her.

Whilst I definitely dont want a man who gives in to me all the time, I can admire the sentiment behind Tom's behaviour.

In the book that Ruf and I are reading, a relationship is about being two equal halves that combine and overlap where one partner has expertise in a field and the other does not. Two halves that meld together like the yin/yang symbol but with each partner being responsible for their own happiness and not reliant upon the other to make them so.

Communication and cooperation are everything.