Thursday, April 8, 2010

Honey Do List

The first time I heard of the phrase "Honey do list" was at work and that was just 5 years ago. After it was explained to me by a colleague, I thought about how my wife would get me to do things.

First of all, I am not mechanically inclined. Second of all, just thinking about doing a home DIY project scares me. Third of all, I'm smart enough to find a way out of doing things. She knows that she can't resort to tricks, so she resorts to tricks. Confusing? Hehe.

Her favorite tactic is to piss me off because I usually do not want to talk to her when I am mad and I do not like to sit in my chair and stew. She knows that this can backfire on her and it has few times.

Her second tactic is using the "We" method. Instead of saying "I need (blank)", statements like "We need milk" or "We need some potatoes" or "We need tampons"are used. Does that sound familiar to you guys? LOL

Next in line is asking me politely. I am a nice person and she knows that by asking me politely this way, it appeals to my nature and I want to help/please her. Close behind that is asking me sweetly when I am either in a good mood or in a bad mood.

Why do we curse/dread the Honey Do lists so much? We can blame our ancestors for not weeding out the hunter/gatherer genes. Too hard to suppress that naturally evolved instinct when we get to grunt and feel manly all over at the gatherer's request. ;)

How do you "trick" your spouse into getting that Honey Do List done?

Shelle's Note: DCHY has just started his blog click HERE. If you have ever wondered what it is like to raise a family and enjoy your spouse all while deaf, Daddy Can't Hear You will be just the blog for you. The posts all ready are just setting us up for some great blog go check him out and follow, it definitely will be interesting!


Alex said...

I don't trick my husband into doing anything. I specifically tell him to he has to do something, or that I would like him to do something. If he doesn't do it, I get mad. I only ask him to do something because I actually cannot (ie: putting certain things away because I'm short, going through the boxes in the basement that belong to him, etc).

As for your lovely lady (haha tell her I called her that btw) "tricking you" by asking politely ... I don't agree with you on that. I don't think that's a trick at all. She's asking you politely to do something. How is that tricking you into doing it? Isn't that what men and women are suppose to do? If there's something that needs to be done, or she needs help with, aren't we suppose to either tell our S/O that we'd like them to do X, Y and Z or ask them if they could do X, Y and Z??

615sWife said...

Same as Alex I don't really trick, I give him options, for example " would you rather do the dishes or give the baby a bath and pick up the house" yeah he usually picks the dishes. Now there are times I have to remind him a milion and one time to take the stuid trash to the crub which drives me insane! He can remember some drug dealers name but no he cant remember to take the trash to the crub every FRIDAY!!! Believe me if I could trick him into doing that I would!!!

DCHY said...

Alex - it is a trick because she already asked me earlier and I didn't do it. So, by putting a sugary spin on the second request... ;)

615sWife - then resort to tricks I mentioned in the post. If you can harness the primitive hunter gene in him, he will indulge that instinct and "hunt" the trash to the curb. Hehe

heelsnstocking said...

Me thinks you are confusing being nice with nuclear war fare. easily done in marriage but you sound like a bright chap and can read between the lines, especially when there isnt any to read. sometimes honey will you... means honey will you!

yummy x

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

DCHY- I agree, if I ask my husband in a kind of way that appeals to his need to be the hero-then I get what I want.

His favorite saying to me is, "Shelle, telling me once does nothing, telling me twice puts it on the radar"

Meaning: you're going to have to get use to asking more than once. This was hard for me to overcome at first because I'm the type of person that rarely repeated herself...with a husband and two kids I've realized that repeating myself is the only consistency in my life sometimes! :)

Great post!

DCHY said...

Heelsnstocking - I like're right.

Shelle - luckily for you, you only have to ask me once every time. ;)

Anjeny said...

Right now there's only one thing my Honey Do List and it's been months overdue. I would've done it myself only it's something that he needs to special order or replace altogether so I'll just keep waiting for it. Luckily for him, I could live without it so that's why it's not too bothersome.

Like Alex, I don't do the trick when it comes to honey do list...I just pointed it out.

DCHY said...

Anjeny - any way you can speed up the process of your specialy delivery? Just eliminating all the variables so you would be sure he isn't procrastinating. ;)

Anonymous said...

Ironically, I get far more of these types of requests from my husband than he gets from me.

I may have to remind him about my requests from time to time, as he may not be home at the time I think of the request. By the time he is, a day or two has usually elapsed (and usually more until it gets done). The only trick I tried to use once was to ask him to fix something for me as his "holiday gift" for me. It didn't work, as I am still waiting for it to happen. LOL.

DCHY said...

Anonymous - why not tell him he needs to finish that "holiday gift" by end of April because you'd like to donate it...and then save it for Father's Day or something. :)

Anonymous said...

DCHY...LOL. Wish it were something good and I would. Sadly, it's only the window coverings for 3 large windows in our upstairs hallway that need fixing. If I open them as is right now, I can't get them re-closed without a lot of effort, so sadly, they stay closed for now.

Come to think of it, you may be on to something. They windows provide such a nice view of our courtyard, that maybe I'll pay someone to come fix them for his Father's Day gift. LOL

Anjeny said...

DCHY...funny thing, after I commented on your post, the hub showed up with a huge box, replacement part for my honey do list..actually, it's our dining room light fixture, I don't know why he install that one different from the rest of the house because those fixtures I can easily fix anyways, the huge box is now sitting dormant on my living floor (LOL) I'll probably set up an offering plate and pass it around with kids with the bet on how long it would take my hub to get into that box and replace that dining room light.

Oh wait, maybe I'll just wait til he give me a honey do list and I'll put it off, deliberately forgetting to get to it and if he asks about it, I'll point out the fact that I'm waiting for him to catch up's that? LOL

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