Wednesday, December 23, 2009

11 years...and still nothing to that at all

It's funny how life can be...fleeting...or fickle...or temperamental...or unblinkingly brutal - and yet you'd get down on your knees, no matter how messed up they are, and thank life (or whatever you believe in) for giving you a shot at happiness.

Before I met my wife in 1998, I was never able to maintain a relationship for more than few months at any time. Why couldn't I? Nothing seemed "comfortable" to me every time I ventured out into the tricky domain of dating and relationships. After a while, I was beginning to think that maybe I was the one with commitment issues.

When I met my wife the first time, nothing happened. No lightning bolt. No magic. No love at first sight. The Earth didn't crack. She was someone's girlfriend and I wasn't the type to mess around. I didn't really get to talk to her - just the introduction and I just moved on. Came across her in a bar few months later and I found out that she was single.

I came over to her, basically ignoring her friends with nothing more than a cursory greeting to each, and introduced myself. She smiled and said, "I remember who you are." That did stop me in my tracks and she had my attention. I chatted up with her a little and found out that she lived just 5 miles from where I participate in a dart league on Wednesdays. So, I asked her out and I gave her every chance to back out because this is a dart league but she kept assuring me that she would be happy to watch me compete.

She showed up like she said she would. After chatting with her for a while, I learned that the opposing team had not shown up and had to forfeit. This meant that I had more time to talk with her and boy, did I talk and talk and talk with her. The bar owner came by our table and informed us that it was time to close. That surprised me because I had lost track of time, so I turned to her and asked "Since everything else is closed for the night, what do we do?" She suggested that we go to her house and talk some more.

I finally left her house at 6:30 am, having chatted with her 11 hours straight and we agreed that I wouldn't return tonight or the next day so we each could spend Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with our loved ones. I came to her house at 7 pm on the 26th and left her house at 8:30 am the next day, having chatted with her for over 13 hours. That's mind-boggling 24 hours total on TWO dates.

She ended up moving in with me just 3 months later and proposed to me 2 months after that. I asked her about her "I remember you" remark few years later and she told me that when she met me the first time, she mentally took note of this tall guy with glasses because she found me to be very interesting. She had been curious about me ever since then.

We celebrate December 23rd every year as the date we started our lives together...and she is still curious about me.

Nolens Volens he also writes on his personal blog Welcome to My Secret Spot (Not Safe For Work)


Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

WOW--I'm not sure we have ever talked that much!!! :) It's funny how certain people make an impression on us.

I couldn't get my husband's smile and eyes out of my mind the first time I met him... so I know all to well about all of that! :)

Sweet post NV :)

Just Jules said...

The first time I saw my husband the Earth DID stop for a minute. I am pretty sure. It was his eyes. Those damn eyes still get me in trouble.

I was bartending and he was serving at a busy chain restaurant in our college town.

It is funny because we also met right around Christmas time (we also got married in that season too)

Great post dear man.

Anonymous said...

First time I met my partner, everything fell into place, and the earth stood still for one moment and I love him more each day.

Danielle said...

That is a really cool story

Anonymous said...

Damn man, I ain't talked 24 hrs to mine and we been married 13 yrs!

Anonymous said...

I met my wife to be when I gave her a lift home after a disappoint social event. She gave me tea in gratitude, and then had a cup of tea on the sofa in front of the TV - and I just got on with it. I didn’t talk at all, well, it’s rude to interrupt the TV, and it was clear what mood she was in. Little did we know we would spend the next 24 years together!

How different we all are.

David Edward

Anonymous said...

Very interesting post and story. I love to hear how we met stories. That's cool that she proposed to you.

Becky Andrews said...

That's sweet! I think when you can sit and talk for someone for hours that's a great sign. I could relate to that piece so much ... Steve and I just talked for hours even though to me at first he was 'just a friend.' that changed a few months later (that was 26 years ago :D)

Anonymous said...

I too noticed that she proposed to you. I read that part several times just to make sure I read it right. Way to go!

My wife and I met at a root beer float chugging contest. I won . . . the trophy and her heart. Yeah, that's how I roll!

Great story, and much love to you both as you celebrate . . .

Shirley said...

That's so sweet. I knew my son had found the right girl when she told me how much he loved to talk and talk and talk. LOL Everyone else thinks he never talks at all.

Jenny DB said...

WAIT I'm confused, so your wife proposed to you?