Thursday, July 30, 2009

Intimacy with Children

Usually Intimacy and Children don't mix. Children have a sixth sense for when mom and dad would like some private time. At least my kids do. Inevitably as soon as the light goes out and my husband starts kissing my neck (or arm or ear or lips) the little one cries. Or the big kid gets a bloody nose in his sleep.

Or vomits.

Nothing kills romance like vomit.

We've pretty much figured out that we should never plan out anything (as in at three o'clock sending a "How about a grown up dinner and dessert night?" email. Because when it gets sent through the universe the radars on my kids go off somehow.

By the end of the night that should have been a Grown Up Night I'm beat down by cranky kids, whiny kids, dishes, milk spills, screaming and simple exhaustion. And the last thing on earth I want is the planned out Grown Up Night. I just want to sleep.

Which turns out to be a good thing because my kids will wake up at the worst time anyway. I surely can't be the only parent who feels like Intimacy is a foriegn word in their house.

How about you? Do your kids have the sixth sense? And does it ever get easier to have private time when they get older? I'd love to know.


The Nice One said...

I have found that it's gotten easier now as they are older. They RARELY wake up in the night, once they are down, they are DOWN. Also, if we want to sleep in on a Sunday morning, they are okay with the fact that Mom and Dad need their own time together. They can take care of themselves for an hour or so.
Ahhh, I LOVE having big kids.

valerie said...

Much easier now that they are older. Put a movie on for them and sneak away. Most of the time it works. :) But nothing kills the mood more than to hear them fighting in the other room. One day my 9 year old asked if we were doing our taxes in there? YEP! Taxes. That's what we're doing! lol

Missty said...

Oh man. It gets easier, and then we are noticing it gets harder again! Whats up with grown children who have moved out on there own show up "just to talk or stop by" on a Friday night at 9:00pm! Seriously! The two teens who live here are gone - what are you doing here?!! lol

It seems, it is happening all the time, someone always home! We joke saying they must rotate whos turn it is to bug us!

So for us - morning delight.... no one is awake except for us! LOL

Valerie - Taxes! That is so funny!

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Nice One - another few years and the oldest can handle the youngest for an hour - without bloodshed!

Valerie - taxes, that's one I'll have to remember!

Missty - You need to change the locks and pretend you're not home :)

Anonymous said...

Well I'm glad to know it gets better. I was afraid that by the time it got better my stuff might not work and she wouldnt wanna!

Amber Lynae said...

lol. The comments and post have been funny. And sad all at the same time. Because we still have a young one i know what Blogging Mama Andrea is talking about. I am hoping it gets easier.

I just need some hints on having video games not get in the way. Have you guys had that discussion on here?

alliecat said...

Mine are only little, (3.5 years and 7 months) but yes, definitely a sixth sense about it that they both possess. So if it's not one, it's the other and without doubt once things start getting serious one will cry..... or want something and unfortunately it can't be ignored, we've tried! The bigger one can come downstairs to us but thankfully can't turn the large round handle on the bedroom door so we get a few seconds to compose ourselves. *sigh* Hopefully it does get better!

Missty said...

I was talking to Matt about this very post. And we remembered when our four boys were little, we would pop thier favorite video in the night before, and put some DRY cherrios down on a lower table for them to reach. lol Talk about desperation for some one on one time! LOL So the kids would wake up, and we would tell them go turn on ______ and then they would see there cherrios there. Perfect bliss! So I guess we have been morning people for along time! You just got to get creative.

And wow - video games replacing sex? That would be a great topic. I can pretty much say sex trumps everything in this house! LOL My man doesn't need to eat, sleep or anything else if he is going to get some. LOL